Thursday, June 26, 2008

the worst gas station bathroom i've seen in a long time

So, I think we were in Moscow Mills, Missouri, when I suddenly remembered that I'd had a 20 oz. coffee earlier that morning. Apparently, this gas station is also a grocery store. How convenient.





FYI, just prior to taking this picture, I walked past the deep fryer in the back. Yep. A vat of oil. I tried to take a picture discreetly and it didn't turn out. But trust me. The bathroom is strategically placed between the fryer and the deli counter. I'm not kidding.




This was the cabinet over the toilet. Is that "Bag Balm" on that second shelf?





It sure is. What is this for??? Udders, right? What else?



Much to my delight, there was a medicine cabinet. How often does that happen in a gas station bathroom? Hey. What's that on the top shelf?



Who guessed Preparation H? That's nice. It begs the question: Who doesn't want to partake in the communal tube of Preparation H???



Oh. This is helpful. Look closely between the toilet scrubber and the plunger. Some extra T.P. just in case the roll runs out.




Wow. They could really use some bathroom cleaner...





Really? Seriously. Has this ever been used?





After you've sufficiently disinfected most of your body, please be a lamb and hit the lights on the way out.

15 comments:

Jenny said...

Oh. My. WORD!!

Oh My word.

Oh My.

Word.

Kim said...

First off what are udders? Second, how did you happen to have your camera in the bathroom?

Tiffany said...

NASTY! All of my preconceived stereotypes about Missouri JUST came true. Did I just admit that? I'm from Iowa. Missouri (or is it Missoura) has a reputation there. ALL of those stereotypes changed when I met you....but now, help! I just don't know what to think anymore! I will stop talking before this hold gets any deeper...

Jenna said...

kim. udders are what cows have. i didn't have the camera the first time i went in. i went. then, i took avery. then i took miles. and then i went again just to make sure we wouldn't have to stop again anytime soon. (i have 23 pictures of that bathroom!)

tiffany. i can't make any statements about missouri on the record. i will say this: there are WONDERFUL people there. and i will say this: i wasn't born there. and i don't know if any of my friends were...

sarah'ssister said...

Hmmmmm....kind of takes your appetite away!

I would've been admonishing my kids to not touch ANYTHING, if I had to take them in there.

~K

Jenna said...

Yeah, K, I did not grab a sandwich from the deli. Although I could have hollered out an order pret-ty easily...

Anonymous said...

OK - someone's needing to stand up...
I can honestly say that I've ONLY lived in Missouri. Born here and all. (And I'm a friend of Jenna's!!) Even went to college in the good 'ole Show Me state. And I will also admit that I have relatives who have claimed Moscow Mills as home (although they don't anymore). Go ahead. Picture them. To me, it doesn't fit, but that's another story...

I can laugh, though, because the back of my SUV is equipped with a portable potty seat, just in case Natalie or Lauren just HAVE to go while we're traveling that direction to see my relatives who live that way, PAST Moscow Mills, that is.

And I'm even more convinced that coffee is not my drink of choice!!

Love ya Jenna,
Lori

Jenna said...

Yes. Lori IS my friend. I'm glad you spoke up, my dear born & bred in MO friend. You are a fine specimen of a human being. A great example of what the Show Me State has to offer. (And you even went to High school with Miss Trista the once-bachelorette from the BEST season of "The Bachelor"!)

One nice thing I can say about Missourians is that they've never dogged on people from Iowa...ever. We didn't even know people LIVED in Iowa. It kind of smells overrun with animals...

(I love you Tiffany. Hope you can take what you've dished!)

Kelly said...

Oh my word...that is hilarious. And once again, the reason that I will continue to read your blog no matter what! I kind of have to agree about Missouri though...sorry Lori, it's in no way an offense to you! I do live here, but come from from South Carolina where a few of the restrooms might even be worse...or where we quite literally just stop by the side of the road and pop a squat! Yeah...picture that in your pretty little heads!

Jenna, on a side note, I'm so happy that I made your list of "Buddie's with Blogs"...that's truly been my goal for the past few months! Want to celebrate with me with a couple nice cold margaritas?

And while we're on the subject...love that I noticed in your pics that you at the Augusta winery and I heard you hung out with another Southern Missourian and I didn't get the chance to see you! Next time you better call!

sorry this is pathetically long...are you still reading?

Anonymous said...

good ol' bag balm udder cream. brings me back. my dad used to swear by that stuff for his hands. being that he had his hands in people's mouths all day (oh, i should probably explain that he was a dentist) combined with minnesota winters and latex (gloves), they got dry. he claimed bag balm was THE ONLY thing that worked to keep them from cracking. so, for me, nasty and simultaneously sentimental. ahh, that smell. that sweet, disgusting smell.

Tiffany said...

Okay, I rarely open mouth and insert foot. I'm sorry if I've offended anyone. I will have to say that Iowa certainly gets plenty of nasty jokes....mostly coming from Minnesota though....must always be the state to the south that gets picked on. Oh well. Lori, I know you are a wonderful person. :)

Neely & Steve said...

Ok, ok, ok... IF there were awards doled out for "Best Investigative Photo-Journalistic (I'm making words up) Story" in blog-land, then I would nominate you. You would be happy with the nomination and be humbled by your achievement while writing your acceptance speech at the same time. After getting dressed by Vera Wang for the awards ceremony, and with Brent in tow, you would anticipate your name being called out. Sadly, you would probably lose to someone's photo-journalistic rant about the environment or the president or how fast food makes us fat, but we would all know who the real winner was...

Love, your older, and wise-guy sista.

Allyson said...

Hi Jenna - I found your blog through your comment on Angie Smith's -- your was the last comment before I was going to post and I click on it to see what "silly blatherings" were. I could not quit laughing at your post about the bathroom. It's nice to see someone else who carries a camera everywhere. I love the communal prep. H and the pile of T.P. on the floor. I had a similar experience a few years ago on the way to Florida in the middle of nowhere Alabama. It was the only gas station around and I was pregnant and had to stop. My 4 year old daughter went in with me and there were thousands of dead flies all over the floor. It was the most disgusting thing we had ever seen --- or so we thought. When we were finished we opened the door to leave and the woman waiting to go in after us was BAREFOOT! My eyes almost popped out of their sockets! She never flinched. She just pranced right in wearing her cute "little" tube top and cut off blue jean shorts and flicked her cigarette to the side as she entered. When we got to the car, we practically bathed in Purell. I made my husband wait until she left to see if she would wipe off in some way before entering her vehicle, but nope, she didn't. Hope she doesn't eat fallen french fries off the car floor.

Anyway, sorry for the long comment. All that to say, love the post. Thanks for the laugh. I love Audrey Caroline's site too and pray for their families daily.

Fondly,
Allyson Stephens

Dawn S. said...

I would have peed outside!

tuckerfamily said...

bag balm . . . love it! Not to mention the Preparation H.

I've been enjoying your wit and insight throughout your blog!

We used bag balm a lot with horses and wounds . . . I think it has some kind of anti-bacterial properties, as well as moisturizing/protection stuff.

God Bless!