I really have a lot to say, but I don't want to overwhelm you with bulky paragraphs. I will try to be brief.
I think I have a habit of inadvertently making people feel insignificant. I hope it's not true, but if it is, I don't know what to do about it.
Reading the Bible:
I want to do this everyday this year (well, not just this year...). What I read affects what I want. That can be good...or dangerous.
I'm trying to figure out why I dreaded (and would have avoided) Christmas this year. That's not to say I wasn't excited to see my parents and aunts and uncle who visited. I highly anticipated that. But, Christmas, the gifts, the traditions...it's shameful for me to admit this so blatantly, but I could have skipped it.
My hopes for him range from incredibly superficial (Please, Lord, give him another front tooth!) to desperate pleading (Lord, save him!!! I want to see him satisfied in You!). On a somewhat separate note, I've learned that he's just not that expressive and I need to stop faulting (and sometimes loathing) him for his communication style. I know I sound harsh, but maybe the next category will clarify...
When I communicate how I feel about something, I am NOT making the statement that this is how I SHOULD feel about it. What I usually mean is, "I'm feeling _______, but I know that's not right and I need to change." Recently realized that Brent is totally different. (You're all saying "duh".) And so when he hears me say, "I'm feeling ________." He thinks I mean that the circumstance needs to change...not me. Nope. I need to change.
Feels so much better. Still can't walk normally, still need the brace, but don't necessarily need crutches. Had company over last night and was honestly embarrassed that I was neither nimble nor quick!
New Year's Eve meal:
Chipotle + a margarita = a colon cleanse, I think. Hm. Maybe we should submit the bill to Health Partners.
New Year's Eve company and games:
Games + three couples who love games = lots and lots of hilarity. Learned a new game. If I can find a directions online, I'll link here. It would be worth your time. I'm addicted. I want to play right now.
hm...I've written a post about the latest thing I read. I need to edit it and see if I want to post. I love fiction. I can finish novels. It's impossible for me to be too careful about what I feed my brain, though. Seriously. I think it can send me into a spiritual coma or something. And I don't think the solution is a buncha Christian lit. I could use a list of tried and true novels that won't pollute my mind.
How much can I reveal in my heart without feeling overly exposed? And...why do I even have a blog? I mean, I just meant it to be a virtual scrapbook and now it's like some Christmas letter with too many random details that never ends...
Speaking of Christmas Letters...
I didn't send out Christmas cards this year. Fits in with the inexplicable Christmas-dread thing. I've thought about doing a New Year's card, but I can tell already that I probably won't follow through with it.
Ending this post:
I have to do it somehow. How about abruptly?