7 thoughts with neither intro nor outro

1. Just so you know, Phoebe is the cutest thing that has happened to the history of humanity. Here's one of many proofs. Her word for "meat"? "Meep". Boom. I win.

2. I hate talking on cell phones. First of all, I don't like things that give me cancer. Secondly, the delay is terribly awkward. Also awkward, the breaking up of the line while someone is pouring out their heart to you. It's so terribly uncomfortable to interrupt your friend's tears with, "Hey, San...Sandy?...Yeah...I can totally understand, but...Sandy...San...I-I-I'm sooooo sorry, but I honestly am not really catching all your words. Like, I get the gist that you're totally depressed and feel like you are one the edge and I want to talk about this more, but I'm missing every fourth word. Let me call you back when I'm not on Marshall Ave, k?"

"Oh. Can you hear me now?"

"Yes....But, I always hear when people ask that. I probably won't hear you if you actually start talking again."

I admit that my honesty in these situations makes things a bit more awkward.

3. I recently wrote a post about dyeing my hair. I think it's not relevant to enough readers to publish. What do you think? Should I rework and post or just let it RIP in my drafts cemetery?

4. I haven't picked up One Thousand Gifts since my last post. Somebody make me do it. Vanessa, did you finish it?

5. I think best while driving or while showering. And my synapses are way quicker in the morning.* When do you think best? When are you most likely to be inspired?

6. This past weekend, I was getting Jillian ready for a holiday boutique (aka "craft fair") outing. It was special because it was just the two of us. But, as usual, Jillian was melting down. She doesn't like to get her hair done. She doesn't like to get dressed. She doesn't like to wear her coat or her shoes. I had one of those moments of motherly psycho-clarity. That term has never occurred to me before now, but I think it fits well. I knelt down, put my hands on her shoulders and said firmly, "You will let me do your hair, because you are going to look pretty. And I'm going to look pretty. And we are going to look at pretty things. And we are going to have a pretty day. Do you understand?!" And she nodded her head "yes" and that was the beginning of a beautiful day. Strange.

7. I grabbed a shower between items 5 and 6. That's how I remembered my story about Jillian. No joke. Also, I had a great idea for a book and I'm not even a writer. Would a dry erase board work in a shower? just wondering... (Does anyone else think I sound like I'm on cocaine? I'm not, but sheesh...sloooow doooown, jenna)

*I totally googled "synapse in a sentence" because I have no confidence when using words that are medical, legal, literary, etc. This was no help. I just want to be straight up with you about my literary dumbness. I can't believe I was worried about this when in the same sentence I used, "way quicker." Awesome.

brain dumps are where it's at. who knew?

I have recently been told by more than one person (read: two) that they like my random blog posts. You know the ones that are basically a list of random things I'm thinking? I have always felt so guilty that the only time I really enjoy writing, is when I pulled together a brain dump and hit "publish". And all this time, all two of you actually appreciated this.

Figures. Figures that what feels most natural is what I should have been doing all along. I've often thought that I should just change my blog title to Brain Dump (or something like it), instead of entertaining myself with an obscure reference to Spinal Tap ("All the Way Home" is the first song that Nigel and David wrote together.) Maybe I'll do that. It would take some consistent writing on my part to earn the reward of a new name. (Also, there's a good chance that "Brain Dump" is already a super popular blog that I've never heard of.)

And now I will commence with a brain dump of epic proportions. (Not really, but I just want to incorporate "epic proportions" more in my life.)

1. I should save the best for last, but I can't. I need to tell you of a conversation Avery and I had yesterday. I ventured out to the grocery store--on a SATURDAY! which means that I must love my family very much. Avery noticed right away that his favorite snack was among the goods. He didn't want to draw any sibling attention to this bag of original Lay's chips. So this conversation ensued in whispers:

Avery: Mom, can I have some chips.
Me (mouthing quietly): A few.
Avery: What?
Me (more clearly, but just as quietly mouthing): A few!
Avery: What?! Oh....I thought you were saying f u!

As I type this, I'm in a public place and I can't help laughing.

2. I'm reading four books right now. Not like I normally read four books, which means that I started four books, but abandoned every one and I'm in denial that I'm never going to read them again. I'm actually actively reading all of them. This is a big deal. Because EVEN IN COLLEGE I've only ever read one book at at time (if I was reading at all...). You really want to know what I'm reading, don't you? I'll tell you, but I'd like to give a line item for each book. Cool? cool.

3. One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. All the Christian ladies be all up in this book right nah. And for good reason. It's very good. I want to give a short description, but I'll assume you know how to get to Amazon to read about it. I'm a little stuck right now because her writing is so super poetic and I've left her as she's chasing the moon. I just couldn't connect with that part. So many times I think, "Man the moon is bright tonight." And then when I take a closer look, it's just a street light. City living. Anyway, I'll skim and get back into it. It hasn't been that long since I cracked it. Just a few days. Honest, I'm gonna finish it.

4. The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. It's probably the reason I'm even writing right now. I've been feeling blocked creatively for a few months and I have a great friend who is a beautiful writer who understood this block better than I did and is making me read it. I'm so grateful to her and to this book. I feel like I'm already reaping benefits from it. Again, you can read more about it on Amazon. (No, I don't get any credit through my links. So, maybe go link through someone else's blog to give them a little tip.)

5. Bossypants by Tina Fey. I'm reading it for book club. Very funny memoir. (Heads up: It's a bit crude. You should have guessed though.) I'm grateful to have an easy read for book club, because I haven't finished the last four or more books.

6. Sacred Parenting by Gary Thomas. Just started it. Already loving it. It's not a manual on parenting, which I happen to be very averse to. If I attempt someone's "tried and true" parenting style, I find that I'm unable to do it consistently and then feel like a failure and then struggle with anger. So, I've been avoiding parenting books for a few years. Lately, I've felt I need a recharge in this area. I'm so thankful that a friend just happened to recommend it. And then a week later, an acquaintance mentioned that she had just finished it and loved it. So, go check it out if you're a parent or want to be one.

7. This is getting long, so I'll wrap it up. I hope to write consistently. If I don't, consider this one of those random long-distance catch up calls with an old friend. It's long, your ear is sweaty, but it was just good to touch base...even if you didn't get to tell them that you're moving across the country and had another baby because your friend just blabbed on and on about the books she was reading and about the time her eleven year old son thought she was saying "F U!" in response to his request for chips.

9 thoughts on my parents (who read this blog and live in romania)

1. I haven't been able to erase their old American cell phone numbers from my contacts. The thought of it bums me out.

2. Speaking of cell phones, I wish I could text them pictures and random updates.

3. I'm really excited to see them in a few short days!

4. My kids are even more excited. I never really experienced grandparent love as a child. It melts me.

5. I love who I'm connected to through my parents. My aunts and uncles and cousins, Eastern Europeans, my best friend in Pennsylvania...

6. I wish my house was in better order for their visit.

7. I think about holding my mom's hand a lot. I miss holding her hand so much.

8. My Dad is better than yours. He might not be able beat yours up, but he could beat him at everything else.

9. As a parent, I want my children to know how much I love them just because they are my children. As a child, I want my parents to know how much I love them just because they are my parents.

Today's Top Five Things on My Mind

1. Just got a new roof today. Not for the whole house. Just the addition that someone put on like 40 years ago. It leaked for years, but not every time it rained. It was so tricky. It would either pour in or not leak at all! We kept trying to patch it, but to no avail. Now we have new roof and mama so happy.

2. SOoO...Now, that the leak is fixed, we are ready to FINALLY remodel our family room. We're gonna knock out walls and build stuff and put in a new floor. Also, we're gonna finally say goodbye to the early 90s linoleum in our kitchen! I'm so excited!!!

3. I love Becky Laparra. She babysits my kids once a week, so that means I get to see her at least once a week. Basically, I'm hiring her to be my friend. And to keep me sane.

4. Baseball season is upon us. Little league, that is. I LOVE it. It completely messes up our eating, sleeping and everything else schedules, but who needs normalcy? calories? rest?? Avery was starting pitcher in the first game of the season. My eyes welled up with proud tears the first time I heard the ump utter "strike."

5. Laundry. If baseball is on one end of the happiness spectrum, then laundry is on the other end. It's all I do.

the problem with juice boxes and other thoughts

1. The problem with juice boxes is that they are 6.75 ounces. I need a good 12 or more ounces to quench my thirst. Alas!! The only non-water beverages we have currently are juice boxes. I guess I could drink three.

update: I had a dream last night in which I enjoyed a juice box the size of a cereal box. if only...

2. Did I ever mention here that my parents moved to Romania? Yes? Okay. Well, I miss them. Christmas decorations are out and that makes me all nostalgic for the Christmases of yore with my Mom and Dad, aka Mommala and DaddyO.

3. Speaking of Christmas, when do you get a tree (if you get a live one). We've cut one down for the last three years, and I'm getting super excited to do this again. I'm thinking we might have to get one kinda early this year. Do you think it will last? Do you have any great tricks to keep your tree alive??

4. Let this be a warning to you.

Never loan me a book. This stack here is OPERATION BOOK RETURN. seriously. (But, Meg, I'm keeping Future Grace for a bit because I'm actually reading that one right now. Oh...and Jenny, this reminds me! I keep meaning to bring you Planet Earth!!) Of all these books, I've read only THREE from cover to cover. Can you guess which ones??

5. Jillian saw this picture in a Target ad.

The one on the left? "This one is my DADDY!!!" The one on the right? "This one is like MOMMY!" wha?? Okay, I'll take it. At least she thought of me at all!

6. What's up with all the Mormon propaganda? Have you noticed this? What's particularly noteable in my opinion is that there is no message of hope. It's totally like, "Hey, all KINDS of people is Mormons, yo. Artists, surfers, businessmen. So like, you could be one too if you wanted. I'm sure you were just hung up on the fact that you thought we were weird. So, yeah. Be cool. Be Mormon." psh.

7. I'm in one of the biggest cooking slumps of my life. It started in the summer when I had no time to cook between having all the kids home and carting them to baseball and soccer pretty much during the dinner hour. And then when I tried to cook, it was fail-time. I totally lost my touch. The kids would say things like, "This doesn't taste like your cooking" or "This is yucky." Brent would say, "It's alright" or "Not your best." And I could hardly disagree with them. I stopped improvising any recipes because I just couldn't trust my instincts. That helped. But now I just dread menu planning and cooking. Please tell me this slump will end soon.

8. If you can't promise me that the cooking slump will end soon, can you please send gift cards for restaurants? I'm kidding. I'm done. WAIT. No. Speaking of restaurants, I recently left my credit card at a Chili's. I got it back and all seemed fine until we got a little call-e-o from the fraud department of Visa. And do you want to know what some pork-knucker ordered with our stolen credit card information? A subscription to World of Warcraft magazine. People are dumb.

9. Uh-oh. I think this calls for a little Antoine Dodson! Fuh ree-ahl.

yup, it was millenium park

What I really wanted to do, was follow up the last post with a "That's-RIGHT-it's-Chicago!" post, but then I got sick. Whenever I'm sick, I totally forget what it's like to be healthy. I can't possibly fathom being productive or cooking for my family ever again. And then when I start feeling better, I'm AMAZED at my new super powers. After I emerged from the rubble of illness this past week, I completely cleaned my hoarder-looking basement. It was simply amazing. For two days, my life was all about decluttering my basement.

And then I remembered the internet. And my blog and stuff.

I'm back. More on the trip soon.

In the meantime, I'll give you this menu item to noodle on. Seriously? I'm an adventurous eater, but this just does not sound appealing to me. You?

it's really hard to write anymore

If I could write a brain dump, I'd tell you about...

1. How time-consuming and thought-consuming it is to have four kids home all the time. I do NOT know how homeschoolers do this. Or daycare providers. Or...anyone. It's been hard.

2. I'd tell you about how Phoebe changed in her seventh month of life. She was a quiet, immobile, toothless baby with dark, dark hair. Between seven and eight months old, she started crawling and sitting and grew two teeth. Her hair lightened up significantly. (We all knew that was going to happen, right? The blonde eyebrows at birth...) She says "da-da" and makes cute noises. And not so cute noises. Downright scary shrilling noises that make you freeze and drop your fork at dinner sometimes.

3. I'd tell you how Avery's playing little league for the first time this year. He's amazing. So coachable. So focused. When I watch my son play baseball, I'm watching a young man. And when I watch him play, I forget about mortgages and meal planning and failures. That's not why I love his games. It's just something I noticed. I don't want to miss him make a double play or a diving catch. I love watching him do things I can't. And I love watching him pat his fellow players on the back and cheer for them. I love seeing that he does indeed have a passion.

4. I'd tell you how Miles is hands-down the best soccer player I've ever seen. (I didn't watch the World Cup!) No. Really, it's amazing to watch him channel his seemingly endless supply of energy and use his usually annoying skill of weaving in and out of people to totally dominate the field. He isn't timid. He's focused and he charges the ball (and hogs it). He scores lots of goals (and he misses a lot). We encourage him to be a team player and pass, but since he doesn't read this blog, I can say he could pretty much take on the other team by himself.

5. I'd tell you a thousand things about Jillian, too, because her personality just tickles me so. I'm especially fascinated with her different relationships in the family. When she puts on a pretty dress, she announces, "I'm cute," and then immediately runs to Brent for approval. She and Miles play all the time. Avery reads her books and she loves to climb up to his bunk...and steal his gum, which really annoys him! She has about 25 nicknames for Phoebe. I love to hear her say, "Oh Phoeb!" or "Phoby" or "Phlubz".

6. I'd tell you about how I stopped using Twitter and deactivated my Facebook account so that I could think more clearly again. Too. much. information.

7. I'd tell you so many more things. But, in the meantime, I think I'll share pictures that I've just found on my camera. Until tonight, I hadn't uploaded pictures for months. It was interesting. "What I found on my camera" posts to follow...

googling toe pain and what not

1. Hey peeps! My left toe hurts. In 2010, you never call a doctor first. You Google. Can I get an amen? But, until Google can give shots, prescribe meds, and do physical therapy, I'm still gonna have to go to the doctor's office.

2. People keep asking if our family is better (healthy). Yes...for about 48 hours. And then Jillian got a cold. And now Phoebe has one. That's just how it is these days. Oh well.

3. "What's shakin'??" you ask. Well, currently I'm helping out at the boys' school with costumes for a play that they are not in. If you don't have kids in school yet, let me give you unsolicited advice: Do not let them know that you have ANY skills whatsoever. I don't actually have skills. I did theater in college. I basically taught myself to sew. Now I'm touted as the costume designer. hoo hoo! hee..heh..ha...wha???

4. Remember when I posted the pictures from Christmas Eve? What you didn't see was what Brent and I were wearing. You'll never see what I was wearing because no one took pictures of me (thanks be to God!!). But, this is what the boys picked out for Brent:

This Hefner-ish looking blazer is something that I think was in style when I was in high school. I can't be sure, but I know I bought it from the Limited. It's just so hard to believe that this looked cool on me at one time.

Okay. That's a wrap, people. More later. Enjoy being freaked out that it's already February.

hello out there (quiet echo) hello out there...(repeat echo even more quietly...)

My Mom called today, following up on letters she wrote to the boys, wondering how they liked them. A friend called and asked the other day, "Was the meal I brought okay?" Last night, my friend Allison called and stated quickly, "Just need a health report."

So, yeah. I have had major communication fail these days.

So, the last post was the day before the FLU--yes the FLU, and maybe THE Flu--hit our home. Wow. Phoebe wasn't even a week old, and we had fevers of 105, puking and lung-convulsing coughs in our home. lovely.

So, yeah. That's where I've been. So far, Brent, Phoebe and I have NOT gotten sick. Jillian still has sniffles and a nasty cough. She's heard everything from, "Cover your cough with your arm," to "Go cough in that room," to "Honey, if Phoebe gets your cough, she'll die." (I don't have a reputation for my tact, k?)

Here's some brain dumpage on one general topic: Changes

1. My hair. A.) What the heck has happened to it? Is it my age? A fourth pregnancy? It's fuzzy and stringy at the same time. It totally requires the use of a flat iron. B.) I'm actually willing to take time to do my hair. Up to this point, I've required THE lowest hair maintenance of ANYONE I know. Seriously. I DON'T OWN A BOTTLE OF HAIRSPRAY. I do have a spray that is used for flat-ironing. And it's getting used. Even with all the newborn/flu stuff going on, taking time for my hair (so that I don't scare the children) has become necessary.

2. Newborn fingernails. While we're on the subject of personal hygiene, I'd like to mention that I trimmed Phoebe's super long nails the day we came home from the hospital. None of this emery board silliness. I think that's just one difference between Jenna2000 and Jenna2009. I'm using nail clippers on my newborn dang it.

3. Before I had the baby, I thought I was nesting because of all that cleaning I was doing. No. I think I'm just a changed woman. I think that having SIX members of our family in a small home has made me a freak about keeping a clean home. There is simply no time, nay...there is NO ROOM for crumbs, mess, dirty dishes, GERMS and so on. In fact, that's another reason it's hard to sit down and write. I could be cleaning right now. so tempting...


4. How many times can I tell you how much I love the boys' new school??? Huge change. I LOVE IT! I NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER thought I'd be satisfied with a school. So glad I was wrong.

5. Change. me not make sentences very good. That's how I feel when I talk to people these days. I left the most awkward voice mail yesterday. Make that (at least) two awkward voice mails. I actually got feedback from one friend that I sounded DRUGGED. nice. I'm not even on ibuprofen, people. I feel like a schmuck that I've dropped the ball and hardly called or facebooked or emailed anyone. But, me not make sentences very good. I'll get better soon. Perhaps when I get a four hour stretch of sleep, okay?

I'll write this quickly (because I'm delusional if I think I'll get it done any other way in the next 48 hours):

I have LOVED getting packages in the mail! Thank you, A & W, Mom and Dad, Carol, Mom #2, Priscilla & Dave and Joy & fam! (I probably missed someone!)

Also, we have LOVED every meal that has been dropped off! Ah-MAZE-ING, people. Delish.

This is not to replace official Thank Yous. I have actual thank you notes I want to send, but in the meantime, just know that we love our gifts and not only have the meals NOURISHED us, they've tasted delish-y-oso!

Ending post abruptly (it's "publish" now or never, friends!!)
pictures coming soon...

thoughts at 39 weeks pregz

1. Do you know why I love Avery the most? (Okay, I don't really have a favorite, but I did for about five minutes this morning.) On the way to school today, he said, "You don't look pregnant enough to have the baby."

2. I am still in shock and denial that I'm pregnant.

3. The last thought is somewhat surprising because, wow, I have gained a lot of weight, I can hardly breathe, and I have one outfit that I like to wear.

4. I don't like blogging about pregnancy, because it feels insensitive to those who would really, really like to be pregnant right now. At the same time, it's a major reality for me. I'm torn.

5. If I should go another 24 hours pregnant, this will be the longest pregnancy I have experienced. That's right. I've never had to go the full 40 weeks before.

6. I thought that I'd get an epidural this time, because I've had back labor (read: hell-on-earth-kind-of-pain) during the last two deliveries. But, I'm truly freaked out by the needle going into my back. We'll see.

7. I've had three children before. I can't imagine having a newborn. Figure that one out.

8. I have not set up the baby bed or fully packed a hospital bag. denial, denial, denial...

9. I am most tired between 4 and 6:30 p.m. I can make dinner, but I feel like I'm in a waking coma at the table.

10. Did you know I make nursing covers?? (of course.) Yeah, I haven't made one for myself. Maybe I should do that.

11. Most common question: Have you named the baby? Honest Answer: Not really. In fact, we've never named a baby officially before they were born.

12. This is the coldest weather that I've had to endure during a third trimester. Miles was born in October. But that was in St. Louis. Generally, there aren't forecasts for flurries in St. Louis in October. I don't have a maternity coat. It's cold.

13. It's really hard to have a positive tone when you're this pregnant. That's another reason I haven't blogged much. I kinda just feel grumpy and don't want to subject you (too often, anyway) to this negativity.

14. I think we can attribute #13 to LACK OF SLEEP.

15. Please don't say, "That prepares you for baby." It doesn't. There is NOTHING that can prepare ANYONE for a newborn...except for previous experience. It is generally easier every time, depending on the health of baby and mom.

16. Did I mention that Jillian doesn't nap anymore. It sucks. It really, really sucks. I am also in denial about this. I still put her in her crib and say, "night night," and just let her deal for awhile. Eventually, her chit-chat turns into, "MOM!!! MOM!!! I mot a cacker! MOMMMMM! I'm ah done. Come hAre!!!" oh brother. Lord, help me. It's more mind-numbing to hear fussiness through a monitor than in person. Amen??

17. If I give birth this weekend, Jenny W. or Jenny R. better bring me some Sunday papers. I still want to clip coupons!!! ;-)

18. I decided about a month ago, that I'll deliver the baby October 9. That's tomorrow. The doctor and baby are not aware of this decision. And God didn't necessarily agree to this plan either. hm.

19. I started a sewing project for someone a LONG time ago. I'm convinced that God loves this person so much that he won't let me go into labor until it's done. I'm gonna try to get it done tonight.

20. Jillian is yelling "MAMA!!! I am AH! DONE!" Better go. Good news is that Brent called earlier to say, "Don't make dinner. I'll take care of it." THANK YOU, BRENT!!!

what was a brain dump became a school update

1. Howdy peeps! When I haven't written a post in awhile I get the same feeling as when I miss church. I come back and think, "Where have you all been??" oh. that's right. I was the one who was gone. yep. That's how I feel right now.

2. It's official. Summer is over. In Minneapolis, they shut down the pools BEFORE Labor Day. Oh, and just so you know, they open them WEEKS AFTER Memorial Day. I would have grumbled and complained about this, but for the fact that it wasn't even hot enough to actually go swimming. Speaking of cool weather, I saw some Canadian Geese in a V-formation flying south today and felt like an idiot for living here. But, really...I do love it.

3. Actually, I REALLY love it here. Even though we're politically in the minority, I feel like I fit here more than I've ever fit anywhere in my life. Have I ever told you that I get teary-eyed when I see the skyline after I've been out of town? It really feels like home in this frozen tundra.

4. Oh yeah...back to my original (although not even touched on!) point from #2. Summer is over... in terms of school! The boys are in school. And guess what?! We're all pretty happy with it. Did I tell you we switched schools? Did I tell you that we were going to homeschool? No? Here's the story:

For various reasons, in February of this year, we felt like it was time for a change of school. As I had done for the last two years, I applied hopelessly for the charter school of my dreams. Kids get in based on a lottery system. (But, once they're in, they're in. It seems obvious to me, but it's a common question.) So, we revisited the home school possibility. After reading some helpful books and having some really insightful conversations, we decided "YES!" home schooling is the way to go! But, dun-duh-duhhhhn!!!! The next day we were VERY surprised to find out that Baby Scheetz #4 existed. I waffled back and forth for a month about the home schooling decision. I know other people do this newborn/homeschool thing with success. They are amazing. But, I couldn't...and I found out eventually that I didn't have to because, BOTH BOYS GOT INTO THE SCHOOL BY LOTTERY (aka God's sovereign will!)!!!! So. As you might have figured out, this was a HUGE relief. Did I mention that our great friends and neighbors attend the same school? Yeah. That's right: instant carpool! And, did I mention that MANY families from my church attend this PUBLIC school? Yep. It's awesome. Public school. Classical Education. Lots of Christian families. Uniforms. And, after one week, my first grader is talking about the Fertile Crescent. And my third grader is taking Latin. I'm in love.

4. Dang. That was long. I'll do you a favor and stop writing. But first, I'll leave you with a few pictures. I hope to have part deux posted soon!



I said, "I know it's bright...just close your eyes and on the count of three open your eyes." And then this is what my boys did. See Corene? Yep. She opened her eyes. Now, look at what Avery and Miles did (or did not!). I was pretty convinced I did something this past Summer to make my boys stupid. (stop with your, awww...don't say that...look at the picture. they look d-u-m, dumb.)



That's my boy. My little man. The first one who called me Mama. I just love him!!!



Here's a sweet one. I love, love, love uniforms. They're just so adorable!!!

confessions, random thoughts, updates

1. Confession. I went to St. Louis for my Dad's 60th birthday. I know, I know. I told you I'd see you (hopefully) next time I came to St. Louis. I didn't lie. It's just really complicated visiting your hometown. The grandparents are hard to pull away from and our trip was short.

2. Jillian just threw a paperback book at my head. This was alarming, but also an interesting study of human nature. She received a firm, "No!" and a hand-smack. This didn't phase her. Then, I said, "Say, 'I'm Sorry'." She barely uttered out a faint "hah-wee", and started to burst into tears. Saying "sorry" was more difficult than receiving discipline. So interesting.

3. Every time I dust my blinds, I promise myself I'll never let it get that bad again. People, they look baaaad.

4. When I was in St. Louis, I finally transferred hundreds of pictures from my camera to my hard drive. Hopefully, I'll start posting more pictures now. But, not today.

5. Confession...Tomorrow is Jillian's second birthday and I have not made a single firm plan.We heard that there's a free concert downtown. Jillian happens to bee-bop to this guys music. So, I ask, Is it so bad to take a 2-year-old to a show for her birthday? I am HORRIBLE at celebrating and recognizing birthdays. Can you tell??? I know one day I'll look back and wish I was the "queen of theme" for kids' b-days. I'll see some brilliant unicorn cake and think, Oh! How I wish I had known about this when my kids were little...or not.

6. From the moment I found out I was pregnant, I worried about losing the baby. This is normal for me, but it gets more intense with each pregnancy...and with each day. Because of the fears, I start out detached. But, as I'm nearing the third trimester, I am pleading with the Lord to let me know this baby alive. I love this baby very much, but have learned that a mother's love doesn't insure anything.

7. Confession. I am so ridiculously intrigued by Michael Jackson's "kids". Do you really think they are his? I can't help but wish for some autobiographies in a few years sharing what it was really like!! I didn't follow much of the MJ hype, but I'm totally curious about Paris, Prince and...Blanket??!!

8. Just read My Sister's Keeper. You probably know it's a newly released film. Are movies EVER better than books? Don't they always disappoint? Not that I loved the book, but I can tell already that I'd be annoyed. For instance, Alec Baldwin (51 years old) plays an attorney who, in the book (if I did my math right), is 35-ish years old.

9. It's summer. We're having burgers for dinner again. Weekly. We have burgers (at least) weekly in the summer. Is this normal? What's your weekly meal (if you have one)?

10. We haven't had "the talk" with our kids yet. I'm starting to understand why people put this off forever. Taking advice. Starting...now!!

"mom, do you still write your blog?"

Avery asked that today as I was driving the brood home. "Good question, I don't know what..." I trailed off as I imagined what I could possible have to say.

Probably just better to starting unloading the thoughts in a brain dump...

1. On Behaviors... Sometimes when my kids pick-up my bad behavior, it's so upsetting. But, sometimes, it's quite entertaining. For instance, today in the car, a van with one of those "How's My Driving?" stickers stopped abruptly in front of us. I didn't say anything this time, but I heard Avery squawk out, "How's your driving?? Horrible." I know, I know. I'm a Christian mom, right?! I'm supposed to say, "Avery, we should practice patience." But, no. I just nodded my head in approval and giggled.

2. On Pregnancy...Today is Thursday. I'm 24 weeks pregnant. Every time I realize it's Thursday, I try to remember how far along I am. Then, I remember my friend Sara who was expecting two weeks behind me. Sara should be 22 weeks, but she's not. And I think of my friend Amy who was due a few days before me. And I think of my sister-in-law who's baby was due around the same time as ours. Pregnancy doesn't look like it did when I was 22 years old. Lots of things look different. There is so much sadness mixed in with joy.

3. On community...Tonight is the annual block party. No costumes costume this year.

4. On beverages...I miss beer. I miss wine. I don't miss coke, coffee or cafe lattes. I still enjoy those.

5. On Education... The more I think about our decision to send our kids to school, the more happy I am about it. I came thisclose to homeschooling again. I can say with confidence that I would have lost my mind if I had a toddler, a newborn and two children to educate at home. For those of you who do this, wow. You deserve a venti latte and a back rub. everyday.

6. On being so flippin' crafty...I love sewing, yes I do. I love sewing, how 'bout you?? Seriously, people. I'm so glad my family is completely chillax about our living room bathing in fabric while the iron and ironing board are almost always set up. I'm kinda glad I don't have a sewing room, because I can be in my own little sewing world AND be in the same area as the family. It's only annoying sometimes (for both parties I'm sure).

7. On boredom busters...I love google suggest. You know when you start typing something in and then it suggests what you might be trying to type? It's fun. For instance, I just tried, "what does it mean to ____" And here were the options:
-what does it mean to be an american
-what does it mean to be poke someone on facebook
-what does it mean to be human
-what does it mean to square the circle
-what does it mean to be in love
-what does it mean to be a christian
-what does it mean to go green
etc...
I know. It's pathetic. It's like a smoke break for me. (but, try it and enjoy.)

8. On the ever-shrinking house...I'd really like to finish off a room in our basement. Does anyone want to fund this? I need want more space. Have I ever mentioned that we have a small house? Usually I'm a pretty good sport. I don't like to actually go camping, but there's an element of campiness to cramming a biggish family into a tinyish home.

9. On board games...So, the other night, Avery asked if I could teach them Clue. You remember that game, right? Became a movie? Right. So, we start playing. And they start asking the questions. "How do you murder someone with a candlestick?" (According to Miles, "You burn them!") How do you murder someone with a rope?" "How do you murder someone with a lead pipe?" (According to one of them, "They smoke it and die.") "What if this gets too scary?" "What if it's like duh-duh-DUH!!" (that was scary music) "What if I have nightmares??" I didn't answer most of these questions. Like, I'm going to teach them how to use a wrench as a weapon?!! But, I did keep going. It's good for their logic skills, right?

10. On "Thank You" notes...I'm 32 years old. I am horrible. I RARELY send a thank you note anymore. I just wish "Thank You" notes were only for when you forgot to say "thank you" in person. Or if the person doesn't have a phone or email. Or...I don't know. I suffer from a disease called constantguiltbecauseiowesomeoneathankyounote. It's painful...hopefully more painful than NOT receiving a thank you note.

10 random things

1. Jillian just handed me my planner saying, "Bible, Bible!". huh.

2. I'm convinced my hair is not growing on the sides. I haven't had a trim since December and I can't get a decent ponytail up. I kinda look like Heath Ledger in The Patriot. Not cool.

3. I wish I could tell you everything going on, but I just can't and that sucks. My comfort level is "full disclosure" and "total transparency". Can't always do that on a blog. How do you bloggers deal with that?

4. I really, really want to do a little mini-series of posts about Avery. I don't talk about him as much as the other two, but he's really cool and he'd quietly notice if I gave him some bloglove.

5. I am super excited about doing the envelope system for budgeting. I don't like spending cash, so already it's making me a more careful spender. (Full disclosure: I'm on day two. Of course, I'm still excited...and a more careful spender.)

6. Jillian just put garbage (from the garbage can) in her mouth. One of the hazards of blogging life lessons for toddlers. (It was some coffee grounds. No biggie.)

7. My sewing blog has totally gotten the shaft, but it will come back. As sure as the economy, it might will come back. How about I let you know here if/when it gets updated. I just made some chick costumes for a school play...maybe they'll be the thing that gets me back on that horse.

8. If I could have one earthly, non-altruistic wish, it would be free flights. Hey Brent, any airlines you wanna work for? No? Happy working at one of the strongest banks in America? That's cool. I'll let it go.

9. What do you think about dreams? Do you think they sometimes make you understand your heart better than just sitting there and consciously contemplating them? Most times, my dreams are whacked, but other times, it seems like I should take them seriously. And I just think the inconsistency is interesting, too. I'm not interested enough to check out a book on this right now. Just thinkin'...

10. Did I loan my More with Less cookbook to anyone? I cannot find it. And does anyone who uses it have recipes to recommend for when I do find it? It's great, but no inspiring pictures!

you didn't ask for it, but you're gettin' it: A BRAIN DUMP!!!

Okay, my beloved friends, family and strangers (whom I adore!). It's time for a numbered list of random thoughts! I know I've been pretty MIA lately. Some of these random things might explain it...many will not.

1. Let's just get this first item out of the way. I've been tired and a little nauseous, but mainly tired. I get my words flipped around. I can't think clearly...ever. Some things smell really good, while other things make me want to hurl. If you haven't figured it out, I'm not telling you, but I'm almost 12 weeks. there.

2. I was just out of town for 36 hours. In that short time, Brent proved his love for me he's a better housewife than me. I came home to a cleaner, more organized home. It's a wonderful and horrible feeling to realize how much better Brent is than me, but I'll take the help any day. (I comfort myself with the fact that he doesn't cook much. It's eggs, cereal, frozen pizza, macaroni and sandwiches on his watch.)

3. It was birthday on the 22nd. I'm 32. No biggie. It was great. Brent took me to a play. Allison and Kevin took us out to dinner. Molly brought apple fritters to my door at 8:30 am. My folks gave me B-day money and prepared a steak dinner for me while we were in town! We went to Chipotle with my sister and her family on the day of. I got great cards. And my sweet mother-in-law sent a Starbucks gift basket! Do not underestimate the power of a gift basket, folks! It's the grown-up version of an Easter basket. Remember that delight?

4. I have five minutes left of my cell phone monthly allowance. I'm saving them for an emergency. I canceled my long distance on my land line thinking I'd get a phone card pronto. I haven't gotten it yet. Long distance loved ones, THIS IS WHY I HAVEN'T CALLED YOU!!! Unless you're Verizon, we no talkie for a week longer.

5. Nose bleeds. Miles gets 'em in his sleep. A lot. It's kinda funny and kinda sad. He'll wake up in the morning. He'll feel his way out into the kitchen. You'll hear a little scratchy, "good morning". You glance over and see a completely unaware Miles with dried blood all over his sweet little face. Sad, funny...and a little gross, but really funny. I promise.

6. Square envelopes. How do they justify charging extra postage for those? It's ridiculous. And you know the card makers have worked a deal with the United States Postal Service when the cards that come in the square envelopes are best?!!!

7. Reading Little Women. Actually, I should be reading it right now, instead of writing. But, oh is it good. I'm only a fifth of the way into it, but I'm loving it. Have you read it? It's for book club. Has anyone started their own book club yet? You people should. You would not regret it.

8. God is our provider. He is so good. I can't tell you all the ways he's provided for us lately, but we're blessed beyond what we could ever pretend to deserve. Every good gift comes from God. Are you feeling that right now? We get loved on and taken care of from so many directions that I feel guilty sometimes. But, I have to remind myself that ultimately, it's from one hand.

9. Following this example, we're reading Psalm 34 to our boys almost every night for a month. It's been two weeks, I think, and they're starting to learn it. Definitely not there yet. And even if they didn't memorize it, it's been so good for me to read the same passage over and over.

10. It's late. I'm tired (kinda like I am when I wake up...and how I feel in the middle of the day). I gotta wrap this up! Have a good night and/or a great day, folks! Lots of love coming at you from Minneapolis!